Castles in the sky: dreams that don’t really have foundation in reality; unreachable things; dreams far off; abstract, unattainable.
Or at least that’s what I’m told. I was never much of a dreamer. Too practical, I suppose, and I’d be the first to admit it’s probably a weakness, to be ill suited to “dream big” the way others do.
But that’s okay. Since “castles in the sky” is what a dear friend suggested I write about, I have my own definition for the phrase — even though my unreachable things are only unreachable by a week, and my far off is a three hour flight.
But a week, a three hour flight, that seems like a lot when you’re ready to take that other reality by storm. Ready, ready, ready. Prepared? No, I’ll not be prepared, prepared for studies and Greek, prepared to lead a staff of 12, prepared to live my last year in a dorm, prepared to make it memorable, prepared to ponder my real world future. Oh no. Prepared? Never.
But ready. Prepared and ready are two different things. Ready for the city, the bustle, the freedom of public transit, the editing, the walks and talks and roommate dates.
But it’s not here. It’s just as far off as an unattainable dream can be. Oh I could start studying. I could write a few columns. Prepare. But it’s not the same.
This transition period is lovely and horrible at the same time. Full and empty. Full because I have on the one hand friends in Florida also about to take off requiring quality time, and college relationships to renew or refresh. Full of texts and calls and plans for the last days, and the semester to come.
But empty. Because the plans for now? They’re one last attempt. They’re shoehorned in, filling spaces between packing and family events and work and preparing space for returning siblings. They’re no longer lazily planned Friday evenings that may as well go till the wee hours of the morn. And the plans for next week and those stretching to what feels like an infinity of weeks to come? They’re just not here yet, frustratingly close, yet somewhere over there.
It’s an antsy, stressful time. An eager time. Sweet and bitter, rushed and slow to come all at once.
It’s a time when in one direction I have this: these castles in the sky — my coming school year, and all the wonderful and amazing plans fitted into it. Still unattainable. And the other direction? It’s behind me. Past now. Sheer memories. Castles in the past? The summer past? Sure, we’ll go with that.
Still, these past few days have their own sweet magic. I’d be lying if I didn’t admit to loving the transition time just a little bit: that’s where the sweet comes in. Fresh beginnings coming soon. Motivation and ambition loaded in my back pocket and ready to be unleashed. And still, family to welcome home, a last dinner to cook and bake, and last minute shopping. Maybe even a few more minutes down at the beach.
Because really, sand castles are much better than castles in the sky.
“Wherever you are, be all there! Live to the hilt every situation you believe to be the will of God.” – Jim Elliot